Sales Phobia for Entrepreneurs? Reframe Selling the Fun Way!
- (Admin) The Thrivology Company
- Oct 19, 2024
- 7 min read
Sales Phobia Got You Hiding? Let’s Reframe Selling (The Fun, Authentic Way!)
Does the thought of ‘selling’ make your stomach churn? Like you’d rather do anything else – even tackle that mountain of laundry that’s started to resemble a small alpaca – than actually pitch your amazing offerings? Trust me, lovely, you are SO not alone. So many brilliant, heart-centred female entrepreneurs I meet, especially when they’re just starting out (our wonderful ‘Foundation Builders’ finding their feet), feel this exact same way. It’s like the word ‘sales’ itself conjures up images of pushy car salesmen, cold calls, and that awful, slimy feeling of trying to convince someone to buy something they don’t even want. Urgh, no thank you! And let’s be honest, sometimes that “sales phobia” creeps back in, even after you've implemented new strategies - it's all part of the journey. Even now, juggling four kids, a PhD, & Femmeprenista, I still have days where putting myself 'out there' feels like wading through treacle.
If that’s you, take a deep breath. I see you & I want to share something that I truly believe can shift this for you, just like it has for so many of the women we support here at Femmeprenista.
I Get It – That Icky Sales Feeling is Normal (But Not Forever!)
Honestly, that aversion to ‘selling’? It’s completely normal. For years, we’ve been bombarded with outdated, aggressive sales tactics that feel completely out of alignment with who we are as women who genuinely want to serve & make a difference. I remember back in the early days of one of my first ventures, Nisbett & George – we were so passionate about our designs, so excited to share them. But when it came to actually selling them, especially at craft fairs or to potential stockists, I’d get this knot in my stomach. I remember one craft fair where my hands were shaking so much, I almost dropped a display! The air was thick with the scent of lavender sachets, & the rough hessian of the tablecloth scratched against my skin as I nervously adjusted the displays. It felt like I had to put on a ‘salesperson’ persona, & it felt so inauthentic, so… icky. I’d watch others who seemed so slick & persuasive, & I’d think, "Is this what it takes? Because if it is, I’m not sure I can do it." It felt like a constant battle between my passion for what I’d created & the dread of having to ‘push’ it onto people.
That feeling, that internal conflict, is exactly what so many new entrepreneurs experience. It's a mindset, a conditioned response to a version of sales that simply doesn’t fit. But here’s the good news: it’s a mindset that can absolutely be shifted with a little intention & a whole new approach. You don’t have to become someone you’re not to build a thriving business. In fact, the opposite is true. I’ve even helped clients completely reframe their approach, like Sarah, who went from dreading sales calls to closing high-ticket clients with ease simply by embracing her authentic, empathetic style.
But What If Sales Wasn't Sleazy? Reframing 'Selling' Femmeprenista-Style
Imagine for a moment that ‘selling’ wasn’t about being pushy or manipulative. What if, instead, it was simply about authentic connection? What if it was an act of genuine service, where you’re sharing something you truly believe in with someone who genuinely needs it?
That, my dear, is selling, Femmeprenista-style.
It’s not about high-pressure tactics or trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. It’s about understanding that you have unique gifts, skills, & solutions that can genuinely help solve a problem for your ideal client. When you approach it from that place – a place of passion for what you do & a deep desire to serve – ‘selling’ transforms. It stops feeling like a sleazy transaction & starts feeling like a natural, joyful conversation.
This approach is rooted in who you are, your unique voice, & the inherent passion you have for your offering. It’s about showing up authentically, sharing your value with clarity & confidence, & connecting with people on a human level. When you do that, sales becomes an extension of your mission, not a dreaded choresales becomes an extension of your mission, not a dreaded chore. This holistic view, where your business practices align with your core values & your authentic self, is a cornerstone of how we work at Femmeprenista & about building a business that feels good, from the inside out.
Unlocking Your Inner Sales Confidence: Mindset Shifts & Practical Magic
So, how do we make this shift from sales phobia to sales confidencesales confidence? It’s a journey, of course, & like any part of the entrepreneurial rollercoaster, it has its ups & downs. But it primarily involves two key areas: powerful mindset shifts & simple, values-aligned strategies.
The Power of Your Passion & Purpose
First, let’s talk about your mindset – that inner world that shapes your outer reality. One of the most potent antidotes to sales fear is reconnecting with your ‘why’. Why did you start this business in the first place? What problem are you passionate about solving?
When you tap into that core passion, that deep sense of purpose, it fuels your conviction & when you’re speaking from a place of genuine conviction, it’s incredibly magnetic. People can feel your enthusiasm, your belief in what you offer. Suddenly, you’re not ‘selling’; you’re sharing something amazing that you know can make a difference.
This deep dive into your purpose & vision is something we actively cultivate, helping you to build unshakeable resilience & lead with confidence.
Authentic Strategies That Feel Good
Next, it’s about finding practical strategies that feel aligned with your values & your personality. Forget complicated scripts or tactics that make you cringe. Authentic selling is about:
Listening Deeply:Listening Deeply: Truly understanding your potential client’s needs, challenges, & desires. When you listen more than you talk, you can tailor your conversation to what truly matters to them.
Try asking open-ended questions like, "What's your biggest frustration right now?" or "What's your ideal outcome?".
Sharing Stories:Sharing Stories: People connect with stories. Share your own journey, client successes (with permission, of course!), or stories that illustrate the transformation your offer provides. Keep it relatable.
Focusing on Value, Not Features:Focusing on Value, Not Features: Instead of just listing what your product or service does, focus on the benefits & the transformation it delivers. How will it make their life better, easier, or more joyful?
For example, instead of "This course has 10 modules," say "This course will give you the confidence to attract your first clients & the strategies to build a sustainable business."
Being Yourself:Being Yourself: Let your unique personality shine! Whether you’re witty, warm, direct, or quirky – embrace it. Your ideal clients will be drawn to your authenticity.
It’s about finding ways to communicate your value that feel natural & enjoyable to you & believe me, when you find that sweet spot, it’s not only more effective, but it’s also a lot more fun! Navigating these broader challenges & getting the right support structures in place is so vital. I see the 'Foundation Builders' in our Femme:Connect community supporting each other every day.
Taking the Reins: Why Owning Your Sales Approach is So Empowering
One of the most crucial shifts I see in entrepreneurs is when they stop seeing sales as something that happens to them & start taking ownership of their approach. This is where true empowerment lies. It’s about deciding that you get to define what ‘selling’ means for your business, on your terms.
When you take responsibility for your sales processsales process, you’re no longer at the mercy of fear or outdated beliefs. You’re in the driver’s seat. You get to choose strategies that align with your integrity. You get to focus on building genuine relationships & you get to experience the incredible joy of connecting with ideal clients who are genuinely excited about what you offer & who you are truly meant to serve.
This sense of ownership is fundamental to building a sustainable & fulfilling business. It’s not just about making money; it’s about creating a business that reflects your values, leverages your strengths, & allows you to make the impact you’re here to make – all while feeling good about how you’re doing it.
Your First Steps to Sales Serenity: Simple Actions to Get You Started
Feeling a little less terrified & a bit more curious? Amazing! Here are a few simple, compassionate actions you can take today to start reframing your relationship with sales:
Reframe ‘Selling’ as ‘Sharing’ or ‘Helping’: For the next week, every time you think about ‘selling’, consciously replace with ‘sharing my passion’ or ‘offering to help’. Notice how that small language shift changes how you feel.
Focus on One Conversation at a Time: Don’t get overwhelmed by the idea of "making X sales." Instead, focus on having one genuine conversation with one person who might benefit from what you do. Listen, connect & see where it leads.
Talk About Your Offer With Passion (to a Friend!): Practice talking about what you do & why you love it with someone you trust – a friend, your partner, even one of your pets (Cappuccino & Espresso get an earful from me sometimes!). Let your natural enthusiasm come through. The more comfortable you get articulating your value in a low-pressure setting, the easier it will be when you’re talking to potential clients.
Try creating a 30-second "elevator pitch" that focuses on the benefits your clients receive, not just the features of your offering. For instance: "I help overwhelmed female entrepreneurs ditch the sales phobia & build wildly successful businesses by connecting with their ideal clients".
Remember, this is a journey of unlearning old patterns & embracing a new, more authentic way. Be kind to yourself, celebrate small wins & keep focusing on the joy of serving others through your unique gifts.
You’ve got this. Truly. Selling doesn’t have to be scary. It can be an incredibly rewarding & energising part of your entrepreneurial adventure when you approach it with authenticity, passion & a genuine desire to connect & serve.
Carlene Nisbett
Founder & CEO, Femmeprenista (Coach, Mentor, Speaker)
Wife, Mother of four, Business Owner, PhD Researcher, Pet mom, Plant mom, 5'0" tall Passionate Multitasker & Wine Lover, You get the drift
P.S. This workbook is just the beginning!
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