Embrace the Chaos: Female Entrepreneur's Messy House is OK!
- (Admin) The Thrivology Company
- Oct 1, 2024
- 6 min read
Embracing the Sticky House: Why "Messy" is the New Badge of Honour for Female Entrepreneurs
Right, let's be honest. How many times have you looked around your house & thought, "It looks like a bomb went off in a glue factory?" Sticky fingerprints on every surface, a rogue sock clinging precariously to the chandelier (how did it even get there?!), & a background hum of cartoons that you’ve inexplicably started singing along to. If this sounds familiar, then darling, you're in good company. Welcome to the beautifully chaotic world of the female entrepreneur.
It’s something I know all too well. Just the other morning, I was trying to finalise a presentation for a potential corporate client, desperately trying to appear calm & collected on the Google Meet call. Meanwhile, my toddler daughter had decided to redecorate the living room wall with my favourite pink lipstick, creating what she proudly called her “masterpiece.” The masterpiece, unfortunately, was positioned perfectly behind me in the camera's view, and let's just say the client was probably more focused on the evolving abstract art than my sales pitch. Anyone else relate to the "one perfectly applied eye makeup look because disaster struck" kinda morning?
Honestly, for Millennial mothers especially, the pressure to "have it all" is intense. We’re told we can be super-mums, build booming businesses, maintain a spotless home, & still have time for a green smoothie & a yoga class before the school run. It's exhausting, isn't it? & frankly, it’s just not realistic for most of us. As I often tell my clients, especially those just starting out, acknowledging this reality is the first step to building a business that truly serves your life, not the other way around.
But what if I told you that the "sticky house," the beautiful mess, is actually a sign of a life fully lived? A testament to your entrepreneurial fire & your profound love as a mum.
Reframing the Mess: It’s Not a Failure, It’s Feedback
This whole idea of a perfectly balanced life is, frankly, a bit of a myth. We’re not meant to be juggling balls in the air like a circus performer. Life, especially as a female entrepreneur, is more like navigating a wild, unpredictable river. There will be calm stretches, exhilarating rapids, & the occasional unexpected splash of, let's say, forgotten coffee granules turning the kitchen counter into a sticky science experiment (anyone else been there?).
The key is to shift your perspective. Instead of seeing the mess as a sign of failure, see it as feedback. Feedback that you are fully engaged, that you’re pouring your heart into both your business & your family. It’s a sign that you're prioritizing what truly matters—connection, creation, & contribution. Don't you find that a more empowering narrative?
Now, I'm not saying we should embrace chaos for chaos' sake. Systems are crucial, especially when you're juggling multiple demands. As I often say, it's the systems that save us! But I’m talking about letting go of the pressure to be perfect, releasing the guilt of not having it all figured out, & choosing to find the joy in the journey, sticky patches & all.
Practical Tips for the Perfectly Imperfect Entrepreneur
So how do we create a life that's fulfilling, integrated, & yes, even somewhat sane amidst the stickiness? It’s about working smart, not just hard, & embracing key principles for building a business that flourishes. Here are a few things that have really helped me – and trust me, I’ve learned these the hard way.
Prioritize & Strategize: What absolutely must get done today to move your business forward?
Create a simple priority list, using a tool like Trello, with just THREE high-impact tasks. What ONE thing could you do today, using the 80/20 rule, that would have the biggest impact? That's where I put my focus. This reflects the core 'Focus' principle of the Femmeprenista Business Flourish Framework – prioritizing for maximum impact.
Focus on those high-impact tasks, perhaps leveraging smart AI tools like Jasper.ai to automate or streamline less critical ones, like scheduling social media posts or managing your email inbox. This 'Fusion' element is about working smarter, not harder.
Then, schedule dedicated time for your family, even if it's just 20 minutes of uninterrupted playtime with the kids or a quick coffee date with my husband. There was one morning I was so focused on ticking off my to-do list that I barely registered my six-year-old's excited chatter about her drawing. Later that day, her quiet disappointment made me realise how easily we can miss those precious moments if we're not careful. This brought home the real meaning of "being present," even when juggling all the things. It’s not about more time; it’s about prioritizing your time.
Build a Support System (& Be Specific):
We all need help. But often, we’re not clear about what kind of help we truly need, or we feel we "should" be able to manage it all. Don’t fall into that trap. Be specific about your needs.
Maybe it's outsourcing a few tasks, like hiring a virtual assistant to manage your emails or scheduling, using a meal delivery service to reclaim precious evening time, or arranging a regular babysitter so you can have dedicated work blocks. One specific example I always remember is my 'dogs in a crate' reality versus having childcare - even a short time knowing the kids were safe & cared for somewhere else made all the difference in my ability to get work done.
Embrace Imperfection:
Seriously, let go of the Superwoman complex. Done is better than perfect, especially when you’re juggling a business, a family, & the daily demands of, you know, keeping tiny humans alive & relatively clean. Celebrate the small wins, the messy milestones, & the fact that you’re showing up every day, even when it feels like you’re wearing mismatched socks (or only one!). Remember my "cringe, but true" test? Sometimes the imperfect moments are the most real & relatable ones.
Prioritize Well-being:
Remember that thing called self-care? It's not a luxury; it’s essential – it’s the 'Fuel' that keeps us going. Even small moments of refueling—a quick walk in nature, a cup of tea in silence, five minutes of meditation—can make a huge difference. Find what energizes you & schedule it in, just like you would an important client meeting. There was one time I forgot to schedule in that walk & ended up snapping at my kids over spilled juice; it was a stark reminder of why self-care isn't optional.
You can’t pour from an empty cup. I'm reminded of something Lisa Nichols said: "Your job is to fill your own cup, so it overflows. Then you can serve others, joyfully, from your saucer." This one is particularly challenging for me; I often struggle to shut off the "to-do" list in my head, even when I know I need a break. What I’ve started doing now is using a timer. I literally set a timer for even just 15 minutes, & during that time, I focus entirely on something that refuels me, whether it's reading a book or just cuddling with my youngest. It doesn't always go to plan (toddlers don't respect timers, it seems!), but it’s helped me create some much-needed boundaries.
From Sticky House to a Flourishing Business (& Life)
Building a successful business as a mum is not about magically achieving a perfect balance. It’s about intentionally designing a life where your business & your family can coexist & even thrive amidst the beautiful, sometimes sticky, chaos.
I've found that applying these approaches, grounded in the Femmeprenista Business Flourish Framework, has made a profound difference in how I navigate my own entrepreneurial journey as a mother of four, balancing my PhD research & running multiple businesses. If this resonates, you might find it helpful to explore the framework further. Business Flourish Framework
It’s about shifting your perspective, reframing the mess, & embracing the "sticky house" not as a burden but as a badge of honour. It's a symbol of a life fully lived, a business built with passion, & a family loved fiercely. As Paulo Coelho said, “When we strive to become better than we are, everything around us becomes better too.”
So, take a deep breath, mama. You've got this. What’s one small, perhaps slightly sticky, step you can take today to create a more integrated, fulfilling life? Share your wins (& your messy moments!) in the comments below. Let's connect!
Carlene Nisbett
Founder & CEO, Femmeprenista (Coach, Mentor, Speaker)
Wife, Mother of four, Business Owner, PhD Researcher, Pet mom, Plant mom, 5'0" tall Passionate Multitasker & Wine Lover, You get the drift
P.S. This workbook is just the beginning!
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