Owning Ambition: Female Entrepreneurs' Guide to Success

Owning Your Ambition: Why It's Not a Dirty Word for Female Entrepreneurs

Ever feel like you’re whispering your dreams, afraid to shout them from the rooftops? Like somewhere along the way, "ambition" became a dirty word, especially for women, & double especially for mums? Yeah, me too. Let’s be totally honest here for a sec… let’s talk about it.

I remember sitting in a primary school classroom, bursting with ideas, only to be told to be quiet, to “stay in my lane.” The sting of those words, the feeling of my ideas being dismissed like a bothersome fly, it stuck with me. Even now, I can almost taste the chalk dust in the air & feel the knot of frustration in my stomach. Years later, navigating the corporate world, I saw ambition celebrated in men, lauded as drive & vision. But for women? It was often labelled as aggressive, pushy, even selfish. & if you dared to be a mum & ambitious? Forget about it. You're apparently supposed to be content with PTA meetings & playdates, not boardrooms & bold visions.

But here’s the thing: ambition is not a dirty word. It’s the fire in your belly, the engine of your dreams. It's the force that pushes you to create something meaningful, to build a business that not only supports your family but also makes a real difference in the world. & that, my friend, is something to be celebrated, not silenced.

The Double Standard: Why Ambition Looks Different on Women

Let’s be honest, the world often judges women by a different standard. My teenage daughter has seen it firsthand – a boy in her class is praised for being assertive, while a girl displaying the same quality is labelled “bossy.” A 2014 study by Peter Glick & Susan Fiske actually showed that women in leadership positions are often perceived as less likeable if they’re seen as ambitious, whereas men aren’t penalized the same way. Sound familiar? Thought so! It's a subtle but powerful message that we, as women, need to be smaller, quieter, less… well, less everything.

This double standard seeps into the entrepreneurial world too. I remember after the birth of my third child, feeling pulled in a million directions, trying to launch my Afro hair & beauty venture, Cocoista. It felt like a constant juggling act – trying to breastfeed, write business plans, & answer emails all at the same time. Just last week, I was finalizing a crucial chapter of my PhD dissertation, the baby was teething (meaning minimal sleep for anyone), & my school-aged daughter decided to stage an impromptu "fashion show" with my entire wardrobe – including the dress I’d carefully planned to wear for a conference presentation. It was one of those moments where I just had to laugh, take a deep breath, & remember that this is my real life, messy middle & all. It's a windy path, but my journey, though slower with four kids & a PhD, is about taking ownership & consistent, smart effort, not speed.

• •Struggling to secure funding whilst navigating the complexities of maternity leave & childcare.

• •Feeling overwhelmed by the tech side of building an online presence, all whilst recovering from a C-section.

• •Constantly battling the "mummy guilt" of trying to balance my newborn with my business dreams.

Now, with four kids & a PhD in the works, I know just how real that struggle is – the feeling of trying to be everything to everyone all at once. It's like trying to build a Lego castle while simultaneously stopping the puppy from eating the blocks & the toddler from using the instructions as a colouring book. & let’s not forget, all this often happens with Peppa Pig blaring in the background! It's beautiful chaos, but it's also the reality for so many of us.

But amidst the chaos, there's that flicker of ambition that keeps us going. & what I've learned – after years of balancing motherhood, business, & academia (with a healthy dose of caffeine & the odd glass of wine) – is that ambition, when combined with smart strategy (Fusion), is not about ruthlessness. It’s about owning your desires, defining your vision, & taking purposeful action towards it. It’s about building a business that works for you, not the other way around.

Reclaiming Ambition: It's About Building a Life You Love

So, how do we reclaim ambition? How do we shake off the societal expectations & step into our power as female entrepreneurs?

1. Own Your Desires: What do you really want? Not what you think you should want, but what truly lights you up. Don’t be afraid to dream big, even if it feels a bit scary. Write it down. Speak it out loud. The more you own your desires, the more they become real. Visualizing your ideal future, as José Silva teaches, is a powerful first step to making it a reality. My PhD research is actually showing a strong correlation between clearly defined goals & entrepreneurial success. For example, do you envision a life where you can take spontaneous family vacations without worrying about budget? Or perhaps your dream is to fund your children's education without financial stress? Own that vision, & then…

2. Reframe Your Narrative: Ambition is not about stepping on others; it’s about lifting yourself up. It’s about creating a business that allows you to live a life you love – a life of freedom, flexibility, & fulfillment. Remember Rory Sutherland’s insightful principle: value can be created in the mind every bit as much as it can be created in the factory. What does your business mean to your ideal client? What transformation does it offer? Frame your message around the value you bring, not just the features you provide. Think about the story you're telling. Are you highlighting her pain points & offering a solution? Are you speaking to her deepest desires & aspirations? Remember, stories are the "PDF files of human information," as Sutherland says – they're how we connect, persuade, & make our message memorable. For me, it's about empowering women to build businesses that flourish alongside their personal lives, not at the expense of them. What’s your "why"? Let that be your guiding star.

3. Build Smart Systems: The entrepreneurial journey can feel like a rollercoaster, especially when you’re juggling multiple responsibilities. That’s why building smart systems is so important (something I'm focusing on in my current PhD research). Working smarter, not harder, is all about harnessing the power of AI. This is where Fusion, the fifth pillar of our Business Flourish Framework, comes in. AI isn't just a buzzword; it's your secret weapon for simplifying & automating your processes. For example, imagine using tools like Jasper.ai to automate your content creation or leveraging Trello to manage your projects & team workflows. Think about automating your social media scheduling with Buffer or using a CRM like HubSpot to streamline your client communication. These AI-powered tools can free up your time & energy so you can focus on what matters most – creating, connecting, and building a business that truly fuels your soul, not just your bank account.

4. Prioritize Your Wellbeing: Remember Lisa Nichols’ powerful words: "Your job is to fill your own cup, so it overflows. Then you can serve others, joyfully, from your saucer." As women, we are often conditioned to put everyone else’s needs first. But if you’re running on empty, you can’t pour from an empty cup. Prioritizing your wellbeing – your physical, mental, & emotional health – is not selfish; it’s essential for sustainable success. Just last week, I felt completely burnt out from trying to do ALL the things. I realized I was neglecting my own “Fuel” & letting the overwhelm win. So, I took a small step – I blocked out one hour in my calendar, just for me, to go for a walk in the park with Cappuccino & Espresso (my two furry stress relievers). It made a world of difference. Remember, self-care isn't a luxury; it's a non-negotiable part of your entrepreneurial journey, & there are many practices, from mindfulness to yoga, that can help you integrate well-being into your daily routine.

5. Find Your Tribe: The entrepreneurial journey can feel lonely, especially when you're juggling so much. That’s why community is so important. Connect with other female entrepreneurs who understand your struggles & celebrate your wins. Join our free Femme:Connect community – it’s a space for support, encouragement, & shared wisdom. It's about finding your people who get the unique juggle of motherhood & business. We share tips on navigating school holidays, celebrate client wins (big & small), & even swap funny stories about toddler tantrums during Zoom calls! You don’t have to do this alone.

Juggler’s Tip:

Batching your tasks & creating a schedule that incorporates “you-time” is absolutely vital to avoiding burnout. Schedule it in your diary like you would a business meeting – because you matter just as much.

From Whispers to Roars: Embrace Your Ambition

The world needs your ambition. It needs your vision, your creativity, your passion. Don’t let anyone dim your shine. Embrace your ambition unapologetically. It’s time to turn those whispers into roars. What’s one small, smart step you can take today to own your progress & move closer to that big, ambitious dream? Share it below – let’s cheer each other on!

If you're a Visionary Leader looking to scale your business & create a lasting legacy, the Ascend Executive Coaching program might be the perfect fit for you. You can learn more about Ascend here: https://www.femmeprenista.com/ascend

Carlene Nisbett

Founder & CEO, Femmeprenista

Wife, Mother of four, Business Owner, PhD Researcher, Pet mom, Plant mom, 5'0" tall Passionate Multitasker & Wine Lover, You get the drift

P.S. This workbook is just the beginning!

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